50 Shades of Brexit: The common persons guide to pulling the wool

As Uncle Jezza swaggers and believes that he is once again in the driving seat, a wry smile is cast across my face and I puzzle on where I have seen this before.

Of course at the general election and yes at many junctures, possibly each week as we hurtle on our road to hell in a handcart.

Theresa’s in, out, in, out, shake it all about politics have created a desperation in the British people that probably has not been seen since the ‘invisible weapons of mass destruction episode’.

Is there any other country in Europe which creates such Jacobean comedy with an implicit but simple set of flaws that would have the people rolling in the aisles if they were not weeping in their seats.

So what are these flaws? Well, where do we start? I suppose firstly, does anyone really now know what a Brexit deal looks like, good or bad. The answer no, because if they did they would have worked together to achieve it.

This pure self-interest of who has the biggest dick or strap-on defies belief as each public schoolboy or schoolgirl interviewed continues to answer those questions which they have never been asked.

Secondly, let’s look at Theresa, Michael, Boris and Jezza and oh yes that odious failed education secretary with the suffix -unt to his name.

What a bunch of mediocre fellows, all with little or no clue to what they want, all fond of U-turns and all placing their over ego’d size elevens in the pie. No wonder that the people have lost faith.

Thirdly, does anyone in the public know which way they are now turning, towards or away from Brexit and is this all a massive plot to disorientate us all so that whatever the final deal is they grasp at it and tell us all it’s the best thing since sliced bread?

Well the best thing since sliced bread was the uncut loaf, ah yes the thing that came before sliced bread. There is definitely some method in their madness on this one.

So there we have it, as clear as mud, I bet JPJ goes to bed at night in his castle in the centre of Europe thinking, organisation, piss up, brewery, which can the English get right first, because whichever it is you can bet your life on it that this is the one that Europe will turn down and once again baffle our air-headed politicians.

We all set now watching our investments fall, our banks struggle and our businesses weep whilst the ideal of the British people is destroyed. People are starting to harp back to the old Europe, in the good old days before the idea of Brexit appeared.

We were all warned by our business colleagues what would happen but in our British time honoured was the politicians squabbled whilst Britain burned.

#brexit #theresamay #borisjohnson #jeremycorbyn #michaelgove #jeremyhunt #europe #EU